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When it comes to the pony, familiarity breeds dread, memories of unrelenting pain and secret anticipation, that swell in the pit of my stomach from the time, usually a couple days in advance, he tells me I will be riding the pony the next time we meet. Over the years, I learned to ride for longer and longer periods primarily because, from the hips down, I either become numb or my mind is off somewhere in lala-land. I have, like most experienced riders I imagine, found the trick is to settle. The bad days in farming outnumbered the good days hugely, notionally by twenty to one perhaps. The calls started as neighbours phoned to congratulate him on the story that was supportive of Sussex farming. They particularly liked the quotation. ‘If it weren’t for subsidies land would be reverting to its natural habitat of swamps and broom and gorse to provide breeding grounds for Britain’s most hated vermin after rats.’ A retired barmaid from his old days of rampaging called to ask was he still. I told her I couldn't do that and she asked why not you liked it last time. I told her I did but I wasn't nude either, she kept egging me on telling me I could do it for them. It did sound like fun but I knew better and kept telling them I couldn't. I heard cindy in the background tell my wife to tell me if I couldn't do it nude to just take off everything from the waist down. I still knew I shouldn't but after a bit more coaxing from them I finally agreed to try it. Even though I knew better. Handsome enough though kind of overweight, Gary oozed money out of every pore. He culled me out of the crowd at the bar as easily as a cowboy culls a Doggie out of a herd for branding. He didn't even ask my name, simply whispering to me, "How would you like to make five hundred dollars for a massage, just a massage, nothing else?"Now, five hundred dollars for the daughter of a trailer trash Momma was a lot of fucking money. Also, I didn't know shit about massaging. On the other hand, I knew.
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