It was almost a relief to open the door to two police officers one night and accept their news without flinching. He was dead. After getting drugged up and drunk with a whore in a hotel room, her pimp mugged and killed him. After taking care of the seemingly endless paperwork and formalities, I decided to go on a prolonged holiday in order to relax and find out what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. I was only twenty-two and had a lot of time to start over. Without a man to hurt me by. At around 2:00 in the morning I woke up, needing to pee. As I was walking to their toilet, I heard a moan come from Leslie's room. Thinking that her argument must have really torn her up I went to see if she was okay.What I walked in on, my young, drunk and stoned-self was not prepared to see. Thank goodness I had been asleep long enough to remember what I was about to see, and realize.I guess at some point after Brent left, Leslie called her friend Kat. The moan I heard had come from Leslie. Winters started and it used to extremely cold. We used to wear multiple layers of clothing. It was in those days that we used to hold hands all the day. The grip between the hands was so tight that one could easily say by looking that our desires to explore each others’ bodies was on an all time high.The handholding didn’t stop even after winters ended. Instead, we took it a step further. I used to keep my hand on her thighs and started to rub it. This was when we were not holding hands. She. After that, Mom and I couldn't trust our sanctuary, for Dad could suddenly show up at any time. In fact, he began using it far more often than we did. On the weekends, and some evenings, Dad would disappear and we'd find him sitting in a lounge chair which he'd dragged around the side, staring at the trellis.One Saturday afternoon, Mom and I watched him from the vantage point of the balcony off my parents' bedroom. We were lying on the thick cushion from one of the balcony's two lounge chairs,.
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