"The guy I'm--" I took a deep breath. "Fucking likes it shaved." Omigod! F-fucking? Really?"I nodded my head."Is it anybody I know?"I shook my head. "No." What's he like?" Not yet," I said. "But if you want me to, I'll tell you about—you know—fucking."I told her about my first time, and how I wasn't quite sure what was happening. I hinted about the pain and ow it slowly slipped away. As one of my closest friends, she asked me if I'd planned on losing my virginity, and I answered, "No, I sort of. Do you think you’ve exhibited signs of mania and depression in the past? Wild mood swings? Reactions to stress? Think about it a bit before you answer.”I immediately knew, without having to think about it, that Jennifer was onto something. My reactions to stress. How easily I got down in the dumps about things. Perhaps it wasn’t as extreme as my sister, and it certainly wasn’t as extreme as my mom, but it was there. But as I got older, the symptoms had lessened. Or had they, really? I thought. " She didn't look up from her tablet."Let me guess, then. Your 'secret place'?" My heart was pounding."Ummm, no, not there. And it wasn't that 'secret' - just a vacant office at work. I couldn't help teasing you a little." "Was it a place I'd know? Did you go to lunch, or maybe have a drink with him after work?" I guessed."You're getting warmer," she said, trying to hold back a smile, still punching and swiping across the surface of her new iPad.I went to the sofa and sat on the edge beside. She sat on the bed next to him. ‘Are you sure you’re alright. Do you have these dreams often?’ ‘No, not often,’ he lied. ‘You can’t lie to me. How long have you been having these episodes?’ ‘Let me get dressed for dinner.’ He showed her the door. Charles looked in the mirror as he splashed water on his face. Each dream was different than the other but usually the dream found him lost in the dark, unable to find the light or unable to move. This one was real and he could remember all of it,.
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