When she got emotional about something, she tended to lose her objectivity. For a moment, I wondered why she got so upset about fraternity guys, but then I remembered Big Mistake Guy—the one she’d had sex with when she’d been drunk. From her meager description, I suspected that she’d been at a fraternity party with Bridget and Toni. I seethed as I thought about what he must have done.“It’s okay,” she said, looking up, her eyes full of unshed tears. “You go and have fun.” Then she wiped her. Lena and Delilah then went into the dining room where they saw the massive dessert buffet with chilled oysters and champagne by the buffet table. The table had chocolate-dipped fruits, three chocolate fountains (with marshmallows, buttery shortbread cookies, strawberries, cheesecake pieces, pineapple slices, and Rice Krispie Treats surrounding them) and a few cans of whipped cream. Lena and Delilah fixed their two separate plates with plenty of dessert and oysters and filled their glass flutes. ‘I love your hair,’ he said. ‘I love all those curls just going everywhere.’ I put my hands on his face, feeling the smoothness from his shave. I kissed him under the eyes. ‘I love your eyes,’ I told him. ‘I love their color, their brightness, and the way they flash when you’re angry.’ Shug kissed my lips again, softly and quickly. ‘Let’s talk,’ he said. ‘Okay,’ I assented. ‘I am very much attracted to you,’ Shug started out. I smiled. ‘I find you warm, exciting, intoxicating,’ he continued. I. A livingblowup doll. Inflated into a fantasy version of his ex and thendeflated when he was done with me."I think you were just raped," I whisper to the person in the mirror.I trudge into the shower stall and stand under steaming water until allof the semen is washed away, but I still don't feel clean. I curl intoa ball in the corner of the shower and sob. Eventually I cry myself tosleep.I wake up when the water turns ice cold. I shut it off and lean againstthe wall as I wrap a towel around.
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